Who: Homeschooling Moms*
Prizes: Credibility with your children, but only if you win. Extra Saxon Math workbooks for all other participants. 🏆
Judges: Classroom teachers, since many are already professionals at judging homeschooling moms 🙄👩🏻⚖️
What: Everything is on the table**. Be sure to brush up on US State capitals, the Beatitudes, multiples of 12, and the steps of the Scientific Method
Where: Zoom, because we don’t know any babysitters!
When: Right after Morning Time*** Central Time (click here to convert to your time zone)
Why: Even if you do horribly, you get to spend time with fellow adults who will probably not ask you to teach Spanish for the co-op
Note: No performance-enhancing or addictive beverages may be consumed during the competition - coffee, tea, wine, and especially seltzer need to wait or need to happen ahead of time
Also Note: This competition has been canceled because the initially enthusiastic volunteers didn’t have time to write any questions. They apologize but will be stepping away, citing their own utter failures to be Sarah Mackenzie. They don’t mind throwing their children under the bus, so they also mention child #4’s inexplicably dogged resistance to potty training and child #3’s genetically-influenced attention difficulties and everybody’s Sports. Maybe next year?
* Homeschooling Dads are also allowed, but not the older children pressed into service from time to time
** Literally, too — it’s all on the dining room table, all the time